Almost immediately after starting my brand new career in the US Air Force, the pandemic happened, which for me ended up being a blessing in disguise. I always feel guilty saying this because I know for many others, this was such a devastating time. And it was- don’t get me wrong.
But on the flip side, it was during this period that my art woke up from its dormancy. Statistics show also that more startup businesses were opened in 2020 than ever before! (source). Isn’t it wild how we adopt new hobbies or reawaken old interests when we’re forced to slow the heck down from life’s hustle and grind?
In this blog entry I want to talk about one of my biggest fears when I left my career and pursued art instead, and what I do in order to work through them.
If you have a burning itch to pursue something you truly love that is ‘out of the ordinary’, or far from what is expected of you (like that dreadful nine-to-five because we were told that is the definition of “success” right?!), then read on.
The Starving Artist
This was an underlying fear to my decision going all-in. What if I do starve?
Oh, my. How many times have these words been repeated in our lifetime?
When I was growing up I was always labeled as “the artist” or the kid who was “good at drawing”. So by the time I graduated high school, wouldn’t the most obvious path for me have been to pursue fine arts?
No. In fact, I avoided this at all costs. In hindsight, I don’t ever remember anyone blatantly discouraging me from it. But in the back of my mind as an 18 year old, getting into college meant finding a degree that would get me a “big girl” job, which meant putting aside my otherwise “childish” interests in drawing and painting.
I remember browsing through the academic catalogs on multiple college websites practically covering one eye so as to not even accidentally glance at the fine art programs!
Okay, technically I still ended up in the “arts” by choosing Visual Communication Design as my major. I figured graphic design had at least money in it and will always be in demand. Everyone needs logos right? Spoiler alert: I hated it and dropped out after year two!
So why did I do it?
I will just blame it on the good old social conditioning.
The concept of the starving artist is everywhere. Movies, TV shows, books. They perpetuate this fear that if, God forbid, we ever pursued music, poetry, acting, or painting (or married one who pursued it!) instead of getting a 9-5 office job like a “normal” person should, that we’d be homeless and scouring the garbage for food for the rest of our lives.
Why is it then, that when we look at highly successful artists (actors, musicians, authors, painters), we hate on them through narrowed eyes. As if their successes were either merely handed to them on a silver platter or they sold their soul to the devil, but never their own hard work. For some this might be true, but that can’t be everyone’s experience.
While there might have been many talented artists in the past who did “fail”, what if in the grand scheme of things, they really didn’t? Who is to say that they weren’t actually “rich”?
In my 33 years on this planet, I’ve come to realize that wealth is so much more than your net worth. Yes, obviously you need money to survive, and I myself am not afraid to admit that I like earning money, but often times “poor” people who do what they love are far richer, far more fulfilled than those who have a bunch of zeroes in their bank account but are absolutely miserable in their life.
Getting to the root
Here’s the thing I learned: Our beliefs shape our thoughts, which then influence our emotions, and those emotions drive our actions, and our actions ultimately produce the results of our beliefs.
Let me repeat that because I want you to let this sink in: Beliefs > Thoughts > Emotions > Actions > Results
For instance, if we believe that an artist starves, then our thoughts will align with that belief, then these thoughts will make us feel defeated and discouraged, and with these feelings of defeat, we won’t be inspired to sell or promote our work, and because we don’t, then obviously no one would know about it let alone buy it, which further reinforces the belief that artists starve…and on and on the cycle continues! See how that works?
By the way, I’d like to credit David Bayer from the A Changed Mind podcast for teaching this very concept. I’ve been bingeing his podcast for the past few weeks! He absolutely has zero clue who I am (like, why would he? haha) and that I’m giving him a shout out- I just believe in always giving credit to where it’s due.
His teachings are incredible! Backed by neuroscience research and studies, they have definitely shifted my perspective on a lot of things and allowed me to start changing my mind in order to change my life. It works- I will share more of my personal journey later on.
Mindset Shifts
When I decided to separate from active duty and focus on doing art, was I scared sh*tless? You better believe it.
I could already hear it: Oh so you do arts and crafts? How’s your little business going? Will you get a ‘real’ job in case this doesn’t work out?
Guess what I realized? These are questions I formulated in my own head. They are but mere projections of my own doubts and disbelief in myself.
Sure, you might hear this in real life, and it sucks when that happens. Especially when it comes from your close friends and family. But going against the current requires a thicker skin.
Listen, I have been in the self-development game for close to a decade. I’ve read countless books, listened to every personal development speakers that are out there, and I still don’t have it all figured out! I’m still very much learning every day, but you could safely say that no one was more desperate for a better life and a better me than I was when I first started this journey to self-growth.
I’ve read Brené Brown’s book Dare To Lead, (not an affiliate, unfortunately; again- just giving credit to where it’s due) several years ago, but it wasn’t until I made this bold career move in the last year that I’ve truly internalized this quote by Theodore Roosevelt. If you haven’t come across it, I am writing it here because it is so profound and has helped me in all aspects of my life, and I hope it will help you, too.
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again…who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” – Teddy Roosevelt
My dare to you
You only dare listen to the opinions of those who are in the arena with you. Not the ones shouting on the sidelines at how much you suck. Not the ones who laugh when you fall. Not the ones who hold you back.
But what’s worse? When the criticisms and doubts come from you.
When doubts creep in, and when naysayers do inevitably slip through the cracks into my mind, I just do the damn work.
That’s it. I keep showing up—I take my art seriously, treat it as any other job, drive to my studio at the same time every day, stay on my feet and only take designated breaks, log what I’ve accomplished for the day and what to work on tomorrow, and “clock out” at the same time every day.
The difference? I’m happier. I am truly living my dream, and I’m telling you it’s an incredible feeling.
Get in the arena and stay there. The money flows in eventually, but don’t let money be your end goal. But rather, what would that money buy you? For me, it’s freedom.
Your mind has to be in the right place. Challenge your current beliefs, focus on the feeling of living in your dream as if you’re already there, and watch how it starts to become a reality.
You have to believe that it will work out, then with that belief, think of thoughts that align with that belief, feel inspired and excited for the possibilities, let these feelings lead you to act towards your vision, no matter how small of a step, and see the results of your work.
Stay in the arena, my friend.
I want to be right in that arena with you, occasionally handing you a towel to wipe your sweat, toss you a water bottle to hydrate, and cheer you on as you continue the fight.
In future blogs we will talk about practical steps to achieving your dream life. It is possible, you just have to believe it.
Until then, keep the dream alive! 🦋
K
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